It's not easy having a good time

.. Even smiling makes my face ache

Its been a busy ish couple of weeks. Last Friday Will and I went to the the rocky horror show at Swansea grand. I've only been once, about 15 years ago, and will has never been, so we were super excited, so my sewing makes that week were our (fantastic) costumes. In the event Will changed his mind and decided that maybe fishnets weren't for him - though once we were there he soon changed his tune! - so after all of that, they have just been packed away for next time instead. We still left the house without the girls, and that is a huge event in itself. 

Wednesday was the day our boat finally went on the water. I wasn't there, but according to will it all went as smoothly as possible. We haven't quite sorted out everything else that comes with it (think groans like insurance), but we are getting there. 

I finished a short sleeved summer Cardigan for each of the girls. I have been working on these for a good week or two and for some reason couldn't get any kind of momentum. Got the in the end. 

These are based on the same pattern as the others I have been making, just sized down with dk and a small hook. I am currently making an aran version for myself. Not in my favourite colours, but I didn't want to buy any more wool. What I would really like is a bright eggy yellow one. 

At the weekend the tide was perfect for us to get on the boat for the first time. On Saturday we just got there in the dinghy but stayed on the mooring, made sausage sandwiches in the cabin, and got used to the boat and being on the water. The girls really took to it, and the weather was perfect. 

Sunday we went out into the bay. We motored off of the mooring and got the sails out once we were well clear. There was only a light wind but enough to take us into the bay. Ivy had a go at tacking and steering and we all had a lovely time. We turned around after about half an hour, and the wind died down completely so we drifted and waited a while. After Will got bored and went into the cabin I took the tiller and held onto the jib sheet and caught a little breeze, and we crawled our way straight back onto the mooring. A fantastic first trip! 

It's become clear that over the past couple of years I have been having something of a breakdown. I think with my mum becoming ill I have had a bit of a jolt and been forced to realise what a pickle I've been in, and that if I want to get on and have a nice time a lot has to change. I have become so fearful and shy in the last few years. Knock after knock has left me a shell of the boisterous, playful person I used to be. I am working very hard now in swiping away fear and worry when it pops onto my head, which is constantly. We are all here to have a good time, that's the point in it all.